Does Islam Need Feminism

Islamic Psychology

Feminism is a hot topic right now with a lot of misunderstandings and sharp opinions. By definition, feminism is the advocacy of women’s rights based on the equality of the sexes. Equality between sexes does not mean men and women are the same, we know that is not true. It means they should be given the same opportunities and respect regardless of gender and within the context of Islamic feminism, their Islamic rights must be upheld.

Islam advocates for the good treatment of women and pushed for female rights during a time when many cultures viewed women as a lesser gender and some even questioned if women had a soul. For example, Islam gave women the right to inherit and own property, stopped the infanticide of females and gave women the right to divorce as well as deny marrying someone. Yet someone reading this right now is saying “women can’t divorce in Islam without the husband agreeing” and that person just proved a point I will unpack later because that is not true.

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Top Posts 2018 for MuslimMatters

Islamic PsychologyMuslim RevertRevert

Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatuulahi wa Barakatu. MuslimMatters announced the top posts for 2018, Alhamdulillah I made the list! Brought a smile to my face so had to share with all of you!

So many of you have emailed me about this exact post. For those that have not read it, click on the link below and scroll down to #6!

Stay tuned for more from them, I am becoming a regular contributor for MuslimMatters which is a goal I have been working on for a long time. Alhamdulillah 🙂

monique hassan- spiritual numbness

Spiritual Poverty and Robotic Rituals

Convert CareIslamic PsychologyMuslim RevertSpirituality

The sweetness of faith can be intoxicating, giving us emotional highs and tears of pure love. Those moments when we fall into prostration, sincerely crying and connecting to our An-Nur, the Light, God.

Think about the times you were reciting Quran and felt it in your heart, really felt it. I love those moments when we open Quran and read a verse that seems to speak to us as if Allah (the Most Honored and Exalted) was responding. However, just as we have spiritual highs, we have spiritual lows.

A heart lacking the divine connection while in worship begins to perform like a robot. We have to pray, this is obligatory, but sometimes the one in worship is functioning like a cold robot going through the motions but they lack focus and sincerity. They are performing on auto-pilot.

If you would like to continue reading about spiritual poverty and robotic rituals, including but not limited to practical steps you can take TODAY to improve your spiritual wealth, Click here on Muslim Matters to read the original piece.

monique hassan- business

Are You a Strong Leader or a Weak Boss

Islamic Psychology

A weak boss barks orders from the back and cracks the metaphorical whip while a strong leader guides their people from the front and leads by example. A strong leader is not someone who yells, loses their composure or breaks down doors when hardships ensue. That demonstrates a lack of self-control and accountability. How can someone be a leader if they are led by their emotions without considering consequences? That is not to say we should ignore our emotions, but rather we must balance our heart and our head.

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Molested by her Uncle

Islamic PsychologyTraumaUncategorized

A family ignoring the fact the Uncle is a sexual predator, forcing one of his victims to remain friendly with him and a woman desperate to escape this toxic environment. Original counseling answer posted on AboutIslam

It took a lot of courage to write in and express such a painful topic. Thank you for trusting us with the opportunity to provide guidance.

It is my understanding you experienced molestation by your uncle from your toddler years and into adolescence. Your family is dismissive of what happened to the extent that they accuse you of somehow being accountable for what he did to you. I hope you realize they are 100% wrong and they will be held accountable for their role in your trauma.

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My Husband Ignores Me

Marriage

A multicultural marriage during the first year living together, pregnancy and the silent treatment. Original counseling answer posted on AboutIslam

Thank you for writing and sharing your struggles with us, that is not an easy step to take. It is my understanding you are in a multicultural marriage during the first year of living together, arguably one of the more difficult years of marriage. While adapting to life together and blending cultures, you are also pregnant. You noted an increasing amount of arguments and an inability to communicate as a team.

Sister, the good news first, inshallah this is a phase you and your husband can work through together and come out of it more bonded. The first year of marriage is a period of change that requires compromise on both sides, patience and a lot of mercy. No matter how much we love someone, when you are learning to live together you will disagree with them sometimes or notice habits you perform differently.

Sometimes, the smallest of things such as how the towels are folded will feel so frustrating because they see it as one of many things changing. A multicultural marriage during the first year while pregnant, oh Sister, please understand this is normal to have misunderstandings and conflict.

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muslims-monique hassan

Welcome To Islam

Convert CareMuslim Revert

As the Director of my local Mosque’s Revert Support Committee, I have created a welcome packet for new reverts. It includes this letter alongside other helpful write ups, books, prayer mat etc. If this welcome letter would serve you or your community, please feel free to print and use. I would appreciate if you include my website at the bottom. If you need assistance creating a revert kit for your Mosque or need a spiritual consultant, contact me.

Welcome to the fold of Islam. Assalamu alaikum (peace be upon you)

As you begin this new journey in life, you will undoubtedly run into questions and struggles. You are on a spiritual high right now, but as with all things in life…what goes up, must come down. Every single Muslim in this world has ups and downs and reverts are no different. So when that dip comes , please take comfort in knowing you are not alone and this is not unusual. This is part of your test.

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Counseling Answers: Cheating and Neglectful Husband

Marriage

Sister wrote in about her struggling marriage. Her husband has committed adultery multiple times, to the extent he brought the other woman to his son’s wedding celebration and forced her to accept this. His preferred mistress is a married non-Muslim woman, so the adulterer is sleeping with an adulterer. Her husband refuses to sleep in the same room as her and states he only married her because he had to and only stays with her for the kids. This Sister is beginning to lash out, her aggression is escalating as her pain is growing. She sought out family help, but neither her parents or his are helping and she was basically told to suck it up and make it work. She also reports he purposefully humiliates her in public, which is a tactic controlling people use to break down someone’s confidence and ability to stand up for themselves. This Sister does not work which also makes it very difficult to leave an abusive situation. While she did not report physical abuse this is mental and emotional abuse. No husband or wife should ever be told to just deal with it when adultery and abuse/neglect is occurring. Despite all being done to her, she is worried she is in the wrong by going to family for help and reading his messages to this woman.

Counseling Response:

Sister, I am so sorry to hear of this great struggle and burden on your heart. I really hope you recognize this is neither a healthy marriage nor a healthy environment for children. The example being set is neither Islamic nor merciful; rather it is one of harshness, pain and a tolerant example of adultery. Understand something very important Sister, it is not just you or him that is impacted by this type of toxic environment, kids are always impacted even if they don’t live in the same home anymore. Children are not as naïve and blind as we often hope, they see and understand when we are suffering, when we allow oppression, when we promote the disgustingly haram and what choices we make.

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Infidelity Issues, Cheating Online Part 2

Marriage

Original on AboutIslam.

Read Part 1 here

Perhaps you suspect infidelity by your spouse, is it okay for you to login to their email and social media?

Some of you might say yes it is justified, but in truth Islam does not permit us to spy on one another.

If you are at that point where you feel as though you have to break into their private accounts, then you already stopped trusting them and are not communicating.

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CHEATING ONLINE

Infidelity Issues, Cheating Online Part 1

Marriage

Original on AboutIslam

Ibrahim was using the computer more often, especially during the evening when people were asleep. Asiyah felt disappointed that she kept going to sleep alone and her husband seemed emotionally withdrawn, but she kept telling herself he must be busy with work.

Ibrahim began keeping his phone close to him while keeping the screen away from prying eyes. Asiyah decided to bake Ibrahim his favorite cookies as a surprise and bring it to him in his office with some coffee, she was smiling and felt hopeful he would be happy.

She opened the door and saw him on his headphones talking to someone on the computer, he didn’t notice her enter. Asiyah didn’t want to startle him during his conversation so she quietly sat his surprise down behind him and moved to tap him gently on his shoulder.

As she got closer to him her eyes widened and filled with tears, on the screen in front of her were indecent pictures of a woman and a chat window filled with flirtations. She ran out of the office, her heart racing as it broke and she sobbed loudly.

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Associate Fellow for the International Association of Islamic Psychology

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